Le professeur de l'anglais

I'm over it.

2010-03-24T20:54:00.003-04:00

I think I'm officially over Twilight. I read the books last year and really enjoyed them. However, I have recently discovered the extent of the Twilight craze. I have seen students who are obsessed with the books and the movies. They have even branched out to all the other vampire media that popped up after the craze began. They read/watch them over and over. That I can handle. What I can't handle is finding out that kids are biting each other and believe that vampires and werewolves ACTUALLY EXIST. Did their parents not teach them the difference between fiction and non-fiction? It just shows ignorance on their part (and yes I know they're not adults, but some of these students are about to graduate). If they believe everything they read and can't think for themselves, how are they going to survive in the real world? One student told me she believed anything is possible. Another tried to compare it to believing in God. I almost didn't know what to say. Almost. I told her that God does not exist in a bodily form while these mythical creatures (key word: mythical) would be the same size or larger than a human so they would have to be seen. The response? Unless someone has seen them but they didn't live to tell about it.

I was just very surprised to find this out today. I had heard about the biting thing before but just figured that was kids rough housing and being silly, although I did give a lecture on bloodborne pathogens when we had that conversation. I mean, do they believe in My Little Pony and Rainbow Bright too? The Cullens aren't real! They came from the imagination of author Stephanie Meyer!

Ok, I'll get off my soapbox now. So for those of you that are not in the loop with today's teenagers, this is probably news to you. For those of you that are in the loop with teenagers, help me spread the message that mythical creatures are called that for a reason!

Doing the right thing

2010-01-21T16:53:00.002-05:00

I know I did the right thing today, but I feel pretty awful about it. The hard part about teaching a small elective class that is project-based is that it's hard to maintain your authority as the teacher. You become more friend/big sister than teacher/authoritarian. I don't like to remind students of that but I had to several times today.

A student made a joke about cheating on a test. Later, she was writing hints on her hand in plain sight of me and even talked to me about it when I asked her. I insisted that she was cheating even though she said she was just writing hints. Then she started telling me how she doesn't have time to study because of various things she has going on through the week. She said she is just trying to make it out of there and will have more time to study in college. I finally gave her an ultimatum, to go wash her hands and show me or I would call her teacher and tell her to do a hand check on everyone. Other students overheard and insisted I was being unfair, at which point I had to remind them I was a TEACHER. Maybe I should wear a name tag to remind everyone.

If she was going to cheat, she shouldn't have told me about it or at least tried to hide. I think the reason I feel so bad about the situation is not because my students are mad at me and gave me a guilt trip, but because I hate that this student feels like this is her only option to succeed. I hate that she has these other things she has to do that leaves her no time to study (they're not extracurriculars). Life is not always fair and never easy, but how do you tell someone that? That lesson is one that must be lived to be learned. Unfortunately, I had to be the bad guy in this lesson.

Grades

2009-11-08T21:02:00.003-05:00

I realize my last post was quite pessimistic and I've had several people ask me how things are going since then. I have been meaning to post an update but keep forgetting. Shortly after my last post, I was talking to another teacher who said she feels the same way I do. A third teacher piped in and said this group of kids is the worst class he has seen in 12 years! I feel better about the whole situation because I really think it is this group of students. They are very apathetic and just don't get that they are going to have to work hard and turn in assignments on time to get through school.

We just finished a grading period and I had a record number of failing grades. Approximately one third of my students failed. It was about twice the number of failing grades I had in the first grading period. That was unbelievable to me for an English class. I promise you, the assignments I give are not hard and I feel like I have done my part in preparing students for each assignment. The problem is that they are not turning the work in. Generally, when an assignment is due, 1/2 to 1/3 will turn it in on time, another 1/3 will turn it in late (which after a week, they can only make a 50) and the rest of them won't turn it in at all. I don't get that at all. I have never seen such laziness!

I am looking forward to next semester and hoping things will get better. Surely by then, something will click in their brains and they will start doing their work!

Procrastinating

2009-10-04T19:40:00.002-04:00

I haven't written in a while, but I feel like I've already said everything that is on my mind. This year is hard. I'm still working really hard, overwhelmed, and trying to avoid doing homework as much as possible. There are good moments, but overall, I am not enjoying this year so far. To be completely transparent, I feel like I'm having a 2nd year career crisis. I just spent a lot of money to get this career, and I don't like going to work everyday. I hate that I feel this way. I have come up with several factors that might be the cause of my feelings, but there is no easy fix. I guess only time will tell. I just keep reminding myself what our pastor said a few weeks ago: "Whenever trials come in life, I have found that they are only for a season and always for a reason."

One Battle After Another

2009-08-26T21:28:00.003-04:00

The past two weeks have been rough for me! I have one really challenging class that is just oozing with discipline issues. I had to take a few steps back after one really bad day and talk to the class about how to behave in class and what it means to be mature. The next day, we made a social contract together, which is basically a list of rules under a different name, and we all signed it. Well, most of us did. The ones who did not got to have a conference with me and the principal to discuss why they didn't want to sign.

I generally put up with more crap than I should, but I feel like I have done well in the past few days of not tolerating disrespectful behavior. And yet, as soon as I type that, I think of things students have done or said even today that I should have punished. Oh well, you can't fight every battle.

On top of this, I found out that I have to do a second year of mentorship in order to fulfill the requirements of the teaching license I have. After I graduated. That's right, I thought I was finished. Thanks for keeping me informed. I'm still investigating and fighting this battle because I think I may be eligible for a different kind of license in which I would NOT have to pay for 2 more hours of tuition and deal with a micromanager mentor from the university. Keep your fingers crossed!

Back to School

2009-08-11T20:36:00.005-04:00

New year, new classroom arrangement:

I have officially begun my second year as an English teacher. The year is going pretty well so far. I am a little apprehensive about this semester however, because I have one class that we'll say is "challenging." It is my first class of the day and so far, it has nearly drained me of all energy. The good news is that my next two classes are not as taxing. I will be glad once we are a few weeks into school, when I will be more comfortable with my classes.

I have also felt like the mean teacher lately. In the past two days, I have already taken up two cell phones, given five tardies, and written the ONE AND ONLY dress code referral in the entire freshman class. It makes me feel terrible being that strict right at the beginning, but I know if I don't do it now, I will have lots of problems in the future.

I've had several students from last year drop by my room to visit me, which is really nice, but I had two students come by today that made me really happy. They were both from that crazy first semester (how did I get through that?). The first student has had more setbacks in life than I would know how to cope with but has persevered and is probably the hardest worker I know. He is definitely a hero in my eyes for what he is overcoming. The second student failed my class and got into a lot of trouble later in the year, but he has come back to see me several times. It makes my heart happy because I know that I was able to reach him in some way. He might not have learned much from me, but at least he knows how much I care about him.

Why I hate APA

2009-07-14T15:43:00.000-04:00

(For those who aren't familiar, APA is a style format for writing which is required for my graduate program.)

Here's what my introduction to my thesis says:

Somewhere in interviews and personal profiles, one question always seems to surface: What are your hobbies? For this writer, one consistent answer is reading. Reading has always been a priority not only to the writer, but to her parents as well. However, reading is more than just a hobby to them, it is a necessary part of life. This is not the case for everyone. Although most people have the ability to read, they do not all consider it an important part of life, much less a hobby.

I have already spiced it up a little, but even so, it is dry and miserable. APA format leaves no room for emotion or expression. It does not value the individual, therefore creativity is hard to come by. Here's what I really want to say about reading:

I love to read. I have always loved to read and I believe my parents are part of the reason that I have this habit. Reading is vital to life. Without books, where would I hide? Where would I find refuge? There is no problem in life that I cannot soothe by getting lost in a book. I love that feeling of falling deeper and deeper into the pages of a book until I forget where I am. I am no longer distracted by what is going on around me and I can fully absorb every word. I feel it, I live it. Reading is not just a hobby, it is so much more than that. Reading feeds my soul. The more I read, the more I want to read. At every turn, new & interesting and old & intriguing books appear. Elizabeth Hardwick said, "The greatest gift is the passion for reading. It is cheap, it consoles, it distracts, it excites, it gives you knowledge of the world and experience of a wide kind. It is a moral illumination." So true.

One year later...

2009-07-14T15:07:00.000-04:00

Although my long break from blogging has coincided with my summer break from school, I have not stopped thinking about school. I am finishing my Masters this summer, so I have been busy in classes and wrapping up my thesis. More importantly, I have been thinking about/dreading/preparing for/anticipating the upcoming school year. I have written previously that I get nervous before every new class, whether I am a student or the teacher. I have to say that it is way worse on the teacher side. Every time I think about next year, and even as I write this, I get a huge knot in my stomach. I love it though. That tells me I am doing something with purpose because I am worried about it. If it didn't matter, I wouldn't care so much.

I have been reflecting on the past year lately, and as my life goes on, I have realized how much I have changed since last June when I started classes for my Masters in Teaching. I think I have grown up a lot this year. I have never had so much responsibility for others before. I have realized what an important position I am in for my students. Does that mean I am the perfect role model? No, but I do think more about my words and my actions because I know how quickly I can hurt myself or someone else. A lot has changed in my life and although some of it hurts, so much of it is joy. I know that life will keep moving on and I will move through different phases. I know God has a plan for my life and I find joy in seeing how a piece of that plan has unfolded in the past 12 months.

The real evaluation

2009-05-19T20:01:00.001-04:00

The end of the year is finally here. I have been facing it with mixed emotions, mostly excitement that the summer is here. It has also been sad to see the seniors go and to know that my theatre arts "family" is going their separate ways. I gave my freshmen a final journal entry, which was an evaluation of me and of the class. I have been evaluated by three different professionals numerous times this past school year, but these are the real evaluations. Those people didn't sit in my classroom everyday, see my different moods, see the different situations and tough questions that arose. The students are the ones who really know my class and know how I teach, so I think it is important to get feedback from them. That being said, it is so difficult for me to read them becauseI have never been good at taking constructive criticism. It is also hard to sift through the feedback because there are so many different personalities. I have to keep in mind that there will always be some students who won't get anything out of the class because they choose not to.

Last semester, the main thing that I got out of the evaluations was not to put up with so much crap from students. So I tried to buckle down this semester and not do that and the criticism I got (from one class) was to lighten up and relax. So I guess next semester, my goal will be to find that balance. Teaching is tough and it takes a long time to get settled. I feel like I've come a long way since last August, but at the same time I still feel like I don't know what I'm doing at all. I'm definitely ready for a renewing, refreshing summer break!

All done with plays

2009-05-03T21:25:00.000-04:00

The second play, Looking Glass Land, was this weekend. Another success! The acting was incredible and the tech crew made everything run smoothly. The audience laughed a lot and really seemed to enjoy it. I felt pretty helpless. I just made sure everyone was in costume and that the boys quit whining long enough for me to put some make-up on them.

Here are a few pictures:

Tweedle Dee posing behind the flower wall.

Tweedle Dum. Dee and Dum were two of my favorite characters!

The unicorn - definitely my favorite costume.

The Red Queen and White Queen. These two are very talented.

The Flowers

Partial cast

Nightmare High School

2009-04-25T07:58:00.000-04:00

I love planning events, but thank God I don't do it full time. I have been preparing for last night's play for a little over two months and full-time stressing about it for the last three or four weeks. I haven't thought about one event so much since I was planning my wedding. However, all the hard work and loss of sleep feels worth it after last night. Nightmare High School went off wonderfully. I won't say it went off without a hitch, because I gave the sound guy the wrong cue at one point, I noticed some ad libbing (which, honestly, was better than the original lines), and the lights could have been a little brighter in a few scenes.... but who cares? The audience didn't know those things and they adored it.

The highlight of the night was the end of the play; we added in our own little surprise after the last scene and before curtain call: that's right, 80s fans, we did the Thriller. The audience went wild; they LOVED it! My students were so sweet at the end, they took me out on stage and gave me flowers, a huge card, a balloon, and a plaque with a golden axe that said "World's Best Teacher." Why an axe? Because there is a scene in the play where a really scary teacher, Ms. Freitner (pronounced "fright-ner") is violently disciplining her students for tardiness and laziness. They said it will remind me to bring out my "frightening" side.

It is such a relief that the night was not a disaster, especially considering I started teaching this class with pretty much zero knowledge about theatre. There's still so much I don't know, but I feel like I've come a long way. I have definitely learned more than I have taught in this process. The fun's not over yet though; next weekend is Looking Glass Land (which is like Alice in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass minus the scary Jabberwocky), put on by the drama club. At least this time, I'm one of three directors.

*I'll put up pictures and videos as soon as I get them!

Purpose

2009-04-07T21:46:00.001-04:00

It has been a busy month. In between school and grad classes, we have moved. Work on the play for my theatre arts class is going well. At least most days it's going well. There have been a few bad days lately. Spring break fried the students' brains and they seemed to forget all their lines.

Somewhere along the way I agreed to help the drama club with their spring play and that has become a major stress point in my life. We are going to have to throw this production together quickly. Really quickly. With lots of prayer, hopefully both productions will be pulled off successfully.

Several events have happened lately that have shown me I really am where God has placed me. I have been presented with so many opportunities this semester, not just for now, but for next year as well. My boss has entrusted me with several responsibilities that I never expected to be presented with during my first year of teaching. Especially this first year, where I was just thrown into the classroom instead of being slowly trained and prepared for it. Although overwhelming at times, I love where I'm at and what I'm doing. God puts people in places for a reason and these past few weeks have shown me that he knows what he's doing.

Theatre Production

2009-02-25T20:11:00.000-05:00

In my theatre class, we have started working on our play. We originally wanted to do dinner theatre, but due to scheduling conflicts and the style of the play we chose, we are just going with a regular production on the stage. It makes things much less complicated as well.

Auditions were last Friday and I was so nervous that someone would get their feelings hurt if they didn't get the role they wanted, but no one has shown any disappointment and everyone has been really supportive of each other. A guidance counselor at school who has helped produce plays before helped me do the auditions and thank goodness because she could see the students and characters more clearly than I could.

All this week we have been trying to figure out blocking (movements) and stage positions and curtain cues and lighting and costumes and... wow, directing a play is far more complicated than I ever imagined. It is so much fun though and I have a group of talented actors who keep me laughing.

What is going on around here?

2009-02-23T22:15:00.000-05:00

Things have been crazy lately at school. I mean literally, I think some of the students are crazy. Last week there was an incident a student happened to see and tell me about, which I told the School Resource Officer (SRO) about. It looked innocent enough at first, but later on the SRO told me it probably wasn't as innocent as we first thought. Then today, today was so strange.

In first block, a student heard a noise near the door and walked over to the paper recycling bin and jumped back about three feet, screaming, "There's a mouse in there!" He slammed the interlocking flaps shut over the top and carried the bin into the hallway. Mind you, this was in the middle of a reading quiz. I told him to leave it in the hallway for a minute. Then he said, "Wait, you have to see it." So he opened it but all I saw was paper. Then he kicked the bin and the mouse came flying up in the air. So I screamed and jumped back and told him and another student (the whole class was in the hall by this point) just to take the bin outside and get rid of it. It was a pretty big mouse too!

At the end of lunch, I was headed to the auditorium for Theatre Arts and found a crowd of students, which can only mean one thing... a fight. Luckily, it had already been broken up and I just had to step around the drops of blood on the floor. I found out later there were two fights, a girl fight and a guy fight, but they were related.

While we were rehearsing Nightmare High School in the dark auditorium, one of the assistant principals and the SRO walked two students (who were obviously in serious trouble) across the back of the stage, behind the back curtain. It was eery enough with the "dream lighting" on, and then to have them cross the stage in shadows just creeped us out a little more.

They say bad things come in threes, so hopefully that will be the end of weird occurrences!

Odyssey projects

2009-02-19T19:00:00.001-05:00

My students turned in creative projects based on The Odyssey earlier this week. There were some really good ones this time. I had several groups make videos that were hilarious! It was fun watching groups of guys tromp through the woods, carrying swords and acting like one of literature's greatest heroes, Odysseus. The best part was when Odysseus and his men got in their "ship" (an Xterra), stuck oars out the windows, started rowing, and drove away with thumping music.

I saw lots of interpretations of the Cyclops, including several different ethnicities, sculpted and attractive, fat and round, cartoon-like, life-like... the most unique was a drawing of the Cyclops that strangely resembled a one-eyed Samuel L. Jackson.

Caught

2009-02-09T19:53:00.000-05:00

While grading some essays this weekend, I came across one that sounded awfully familiar. So I flipped back through the stack I had already read and found its match. The essays were almost identical, with just a few words changed. My first thought was that these students had found this essay online. So I googled the essay topic but couldn't find anything close enough to the topic I had assigned. I set those aside to deal with later, went on grading, and guess what I found? Another one! Three nearly identical essays.

What surprised me was the students that had done it. I would never expect this from any of them. They are all A students who are on sports teams and generally good students. Two of them were in my first block class, so I pulled them out in the hall and basically told them they were caught. Both students blanched and looked a little sick. I told them I was disappointed in them and they would both receive zeros for the assignment. They also have to get their papers signed by their parents tonight. Neither one said a word, but the look on their faces said it all. When I talked to the third student in fourth block, she started crying and apologized. I felt so bad for her because I could see how much regret she was feeling that I almost cried with her. I held it together though and told her she was forgiven but I wanted her to learn from this mistake.

This is the first time I have come across a situation like this. I was surprised that it was good upper level students who cheated, but then again, those are the students who care about their grade. They are the ones who are smart enough to attempt turning in the same essay with a few changes. Lower level students would just not do the assignment. The problem with these three students is that they thought either A) I'm not very smart or B) I don't actually read their work. I'm sure they have had teachers who didn't read their work. Maybe they had a life, but I don't. I actually read every word my students turn in to me. Hopefully word will get around about what happened and I won't have any more students try to pull a fast one on me again.

New Adventures

2009-01-26T20:37:00.000-05:00

I realized today that I haven't blogged in a while. It never ceases to amaze me how much teaching can take over my life. My classes are going really well so far and although my stress level is still high, it is much better than last semester (for the moment). Some stories from the past few weeks:

Some people don't have to work when it's cold, raining, or if there's a possibility of ice or snow. I'm lucky to be counted in that number. I just gave out progress reports and we haven't had a full week of school yet.
When I checked dress code and found two students out of dress code, I was told I was mean and that no other teachers checked for dress code. Yeah right.
Let me give you a sample of the most vague, boring autobiography ever written: "I had a good childhood. I am living my present. I will have a good future. Here is my autobiograpy." This could be the autobiograpy of one of my students, myself, a child in Nigeria, or a retired Russian soldier.
I was asked to be part of a leadership team. It's kind of scary because I am so young and inexperienced but at the same time I feel so honored. Hopefully it means job security!
I am having so much fun with my drama class. It is a great group of students who are talented actors. I am excited about the projects we are doing in there and because the drama club officers are in my class, they asked me to be co-teacher director of the spring play. This is a new adventure for me but I think it will be a lot of fun.
I already have one student who I'm not sure I'm going to be able to reach. When I talk to him, I can see that he hears me but he's not giving anything back. He hasn't done any work at all for my class yet. On a brighter note, I have two or three others I'm going to have to work with pretty closely, but that's it. Overall, I have really self-motivated students this semester.

This will be a fun semester and hopefully I will have lots of interesting stories to share!

Back-to-school nerves

2009-01-05T17:05:00.000-05:00

School starts back tomorrow and I am nervous. I have always gotten nervous before the first day of school, even in college and now in my graduate classes. I am especially nervous this time though for a few reasons. First, I have never started the year out as a teacher. I started late last semester, so I haven't been through the first day "getting to know you" phase. Second, I am teaching a new class that I have to travel across school for and I still don't have a concrete grip on what we will be doing in the class. To top it off, the drama class is mostly juniors and seniors. I know how to handle my freshmen, but the older ones make me nervous. I am excited about the fresh start as well, so after I get to know my students, I will be fine!

Reflections and Changes

2008-12-21T11:30:00.000-05:00

Reflections:

I have officially finished my first semester as a high school teacher. I don't think I've ever had a more stressful few months. I have learned that teaching is way more work and way more fun than I ever anticipated.

I never imagined when I started grad school last June that I would have no life whatsoever from September through December. I did not realize the amount of planning it takes to teach for the first time. From figuring out how to squeeze in everything we had to cover to making lesson plans to creating handouts to writing tests, I spent hours every day working when I was not at work. After that, I still had my grad classes and the work from them to do, grading, and crashing from exhaustion to fit in. I haven't gone this long without seeing my family since I lived in another country. I was not prepared for that to happen. I knew I would be busy, but I had no idea how busy.

Teaching is fun because students are fun. They are hilarious!

One thing that helped me a lot but was still hard to accept at times was that I knew I couldn't reach every student. I was given that wise piece of advice several times last summer so I kept it in the back of my mind, but I still felt disappointed at the end of the semester when I stopped and thought about the students that I didn't develop a relationship with. On the positive side, there were only a few in each class. And this brings me to the best part of teaching: the relationships. Who knew high school freshmen could be so interesting? Some of them don't realize how wonderful they really are, which is part of why I love this age group. They are still vulnerable, they don't have walls built up, and you can always trace excessive pride back to insecurity. I don't have a lot of patience for adults, because they are hard to change. But teenagers can still be taught. I don't mean I can teach them subject-verb agreement (gag) and who wrote Animal Farm, but I can teach them about the dangers of prejudice, about forgiveness, and most of all, about love. That has been my goal all semester: to teach, or rather show, my students about forgiveness and unconditional love. Did I succeed? I have no idea. Did I fail? At times, I know I did. My hope is that somewhere, I did show a student what it means to be forgiven and still loved. For some of them, maybe one day they will learn why I did that. Not because I'm a good person or a good teacher, but because God first loved me.

Changes:

Next semester is going to be completely different for me. My schedule was changed around last minute to help another teacher out who is sick, and now I will be teaching two ninth grade English classes: a mid-level class (which I taught this semester) and an honors class, and an advanced drama class. I have never even taken a drama class before. I had an English teacher in middle and high school who incorporated a lot of drama, so I know a little. However, I do NOT feel prepared to teach this class! I think it will be a really fun class because it is an elective and the students who are in it want to be there. It's also a lot of hands-on work and projects, which should be fun. I know I'm going to end up looking like I don't know what I'm talking about, so I might as well accept it.

I'm excited about next semester but also very nervous. I get all new students and there's things about my teaching that I want to change (be meaner), so I'm sure I will be wanting to throw up every morning. The opportunity to have all new students also gives me the opportunity to start fresh and not make the same mistakes I made last semester. I'm looking forward to it!

Twilight

2008-12-04T17:25:00.000-05:00

I have joined the latest teenage obsession... the Twilight series. I have been watching students read these books all semester but I wanted to wait until I was finished reading for grad school before I started. I finally borrowed the first book from a student over Thanksgiving break and I am now obsessed. I read the second book in two days and am anxiously awaiting getting my hands on the third book tomorrow. Luckily, I have a group of students who love Twilight as much as I do, so we can talk about it everyday. We are thinking about starting a Twilight book club.

As a teacher, specifically an English teacher, it is great to see students passionately reading these books. As a book lover and avid reader, it feels so good to get lost in these amazing books after months of reading about educational philosophy. There is one thing that worries me a little. The librarian at our school, who has a daughter my age, told me that she read the first book and that was enough for her; meanwhile, I'm allowing myself to fall into obsession about Edward Cullen, Bella, and the world they live in, just like the teenagers. It serves as another reminder to me that I am often more like my students than I am like their parents. It's a nice place to be.

If you haven't joined the Twilight craze, I highly recommend it!

Traumatized: Ninth graders do what?

2008-11-24T18:10:00.000-05:00

Aaaahh!! I found a note in the hall today between two of my special (not as in special ed, as in they have a special place in my heart) students that totally traumatized me! I wish they were joking about the things they were talking about but I know they weren't. Now I have to figure out what to say to them tomorrow, if I dare even broach the topic. How do you say, you will regret these things in a few short years, this is for marriage, or you should at least be in a committed relationship? No wonder so many parents just scream, "Sex is bad!" and run.

Moments that make it all worth it

2008-11-21T18:20:00.000-05:00

One of my students, ok let's be honest, one of my favorite students, came to my room after school to hang out while she waited for her mom to come pick her up. I loved being able to have one on one time with her. She also let me listen to a recording of her singing and playing guitar and she is amazing. It made her so nervous to let me listen to her sing that her hands were shaking. I felt so honored that she was willing to let her veil down and let me see the real Megan.* She also told me that I was her favorite teacher and she was sad that the semester is almost over. Special moments like these make me thankful that I teach high school. I wouldn't want to teach any younger group because I wouldn't be able to create the relationships I can with teenagers.

Tests, Drugs, and Shakespeare

2008-11-19T21:03:00.000-05:00

Today I experienced two realities of high school that I had not yet faced. The first was standardized testing. I had to have my students fill out their personal information on their answer sheets, even though the test is not for two weeks. I think that is the hard part though, getting everyone's information correctly filled out. Now they just have to take the test.

The second reality was the arrival of the drug dogs in school today. Students are given an amnesty bag in which they can deposit any drugs, tobacco, pills, or related paraphernalia while the teachers are out of the room. They didn't do that when I was in high school and I'm not completely sure what I think of the concept yet. I think it gives students the opportunity to make the right choice. Teenage brains don't often process that their actions have consequences and I think the amnesty bag is intended to trigger that thought process. However, those that are old enough to drive do not have the same luxury of forgiveness if they keep illegal substances in their car.

There is a student in the high school who is only there for half the day because he is gifted and spends the other half of the day at another school with peers his age. He was so frightened by the thought of the drug dogs that he asked if his chapstick was ok to keep in his pocket and fell out of his chair. Poor kid. I forgot how scary it is when the drug dogs are in the building, even when you're completely innocent, even when you're the teacher. There was nothing in my class's bag. I was glad but surprised. Although I'd like to believe they had nothing to deposit in the bag, knowing that class the way I do, I'm sure there were items in my students' backpacks, purses, and pockets that should have been placed in the bag.

We started reading Romeo & Juliet in all of my classes today and they love it. I love Shakespeare too, so that makes it fun to teach. Hopefully their enthusiasm holds out through the end of the semester. With that in mind, I'll end this post with one of my favorite quotes from the play:

"Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight!For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night."
(Romeo, upon seeing Juliet for the first time)

Caleb's paper

2008-11-15T14:57:00.000-05:00

This post is not about my teaching but about a student. Not my student, but my beloved brother who is a junior in high school. He wrote this paper which literally made my jaw drop. He is an amazing writer. I wish I had more students who could write like this. I'm so proud of you, Cabe! (And I didn't correct anything, because I knew you would expect me to do something like that.)

Highway Hatred
By Caleb Baker

Imagine your driving on a nice country road, with a rock wall fence to the right of this road. There are trees over 100 years old in rows along this road. Oaks and ash and maple trees standing like tired soldiers leaning over the road. On your left you notice that past the ancient trees you see a beautiful horse farm with grass as fresh and lush as it is in the first of spring when new sprouts are born. The rolling hills and mountain ranges you see in the distance take you to a place you may have never experienced before but would love to find. This drive is a path to your utopia, but then, this road comes to an end, as all things do. You find yourself at the intersection of your new found path and a path traveled by far too many. A four lane highway. After you’ve seen this, your dreams of finally finding your utopia are killed. You start to think of how foolish your thoughts were, of the road you turn from. You realize that this is the real world and the world moves at a fast pace.

I’m no Environmentalist, but who in this world looks at a mountain range or an open plain of grass or a 100 foot tree and has a feeling of disgust? Our ancestors made dirt trails in the earth, and then it grew to cobble stone roads, and then to the blacktop we have to this day. When we look at these massive highways and interstates in our world today we don’t even notice what might have been there before these roads were built. This brings me to my issue I wish to discuss with you. I really hate highways. I live on a small “country” road called Catnip Hill. Catnip Hill connects to a two lane road called Harrodsburg road. Now let me give you a little background on Harrodsburg rd. It is also known as U.S. 68 but it is known as Harrodsburg rd. between the two cities Lexington and Harrodsburg. U.S. 68 runs as far as Ohio to Tennessee. Harrodsburg rd. has some tricky turns and some steep inclines and declines. People live off of Harrodsburg rd. and own farms right up to the edge of it. People that drove the road dangerously would wreck and because of so many wrecks on the road the people in Jessamine county decided to expand the road to a four lane highway.

In order to make a highway you must first ready the land. By this I mean that one must destroy anything and everything that stands in the way of the highway that was being built. No trees or houses or barns would be sparred. Day after day riding on Harrodsburg rd. I saw trees being chopped down and even someone being forced to leave their homes. The houses were soon torn down to ruble. When the construction workers started turning the earth over I asked why the road was so wide if only one road was being put in? I thought that building a four lane high meant that they were going to make two more lanes and have the already two lane road to make four. Turns out that the original road wasn’t “good” enough so they were making an entirely new four lane road with a turning lane in the middle. Just something else to destroy more property. Areas of land that one could only find beautiful tall trees and long fence rows, were now reduced to seeing nothing but a very long road of dirt that has yet to be black topped.

As I rode with a friend of mine one day on Harrodsburg rd. and looked at all the mounds of overturned earth and piles of trees being readied to burn, he looked at me and said, “This used to be the most beautiful road to drive on to get to Nicholasville or Harrodsburg.”. There was no disagreeing either. It isn’t just the drivers or the environment that was hurt by this new highway. The people that live anywhere near the road are now going to be infected with the poison of noise. With this new highway it will bring in more cars and more drivers and anyone that is outside of a car near that road will have to smell the fumes of gas and hear a never ending sound of tires on blacktop.

Now don’t think of me as an idiot. I understand that in today’s fast paced lifestyle one would rather spend ten minutes to go through a mountain rather than spend an hour going around it. With today’s high priced gas, I too would much rather save my money to go a shorter way. So although I hate to admit it that this four lane highway is very much needed, I must admit it. It may be my inner Kentuckian farmer instinct that the land should come first, but for those of you that may be from large cities and don’t naturally notice land or maybe you’ve been sucked in the fast paced life style. I urge you to take a country road the next time you need to drive somewhere. I urge you to drive slow and roll the windows down. Smell the fresh grass of a new Spring. To take in the shade of the trees above you and don’t forget to notice the rock wall fence to the right of this road.

Field Trip

2008-11-12T21:30:00.000-05:00

I experienced my first field trip today. We went to see a play. It was stressful. No one likes to attend events that aren't organized down to the minutest detail (or maybe that's just me) and this one was not! To start out the day, my 1st block was ca-razy today and I had to situate them with the sub that I was sharing with the other freshman English teachers quickly.

I don't want to go into too much detail, but there was a mix-up? about what time we would return from the trip and therefore issues about subs who had been scheduled for half-day staying longer. That was sort of resolved but still made me anxious because we would be arriving after 3rd block started instead of before. After the play, there was only one of three buses waiting, then the other bus came, then they left. And there I stood with one other teacher and a busload of freshmen... on the street.... on Lee's campus... during a class change. The students were freezing and the other teacher couldn't get a hold of the teacher who was in charge of the trip. Needless to say, we were pretty late arriving back at school. In addition to us arriving late, the rest of the school was on a weird lunch schedule because we had Thanksgiving early. So my 3rd block was only a little more than an hour long on a day when it is normally almost two hours long.

My vote is that if you're going to take a field trip, just take the whole day! I was exhausted by the time we got back and I still had to teach two classes and be evaluated by my supervising professor. I'm going to volunteer to plan the next trip. I don't know if that will increase or decrease my anxiety level, but I can't go through this again!

Fall blues

2008-10-28T21:11:00.000-04:00

7 weeks til Christmas break, 4 weeks til Thanksgiving break, and 4 days until Election Day, aka "Staff Development" day. I am looking forward to every break possible! I don't know what Fall break did to me or my students, but either I am not motivated or they decided they don't want to play school anymore. I have had more discipline problems in the past two weeks than I've had all year. I was so frustrated yesterday because I felt like no one was listening to me. I threatened one class today and told them I had the power to make their lives not fun. (Didn't want to make my threat too strong, maybe that's my problem.) On a better note, one normally obstinate student who has been in a lot of trouble with me lately actually said "yes, ma'am" when I asked him to do something. I was floored. Hopefully this attitude keeps up because they are wearing me out! I have a loose plan for discipline, it's just hard to implement it when you've never done it before. I don't like disciplining, especially when it's a change from the way I've already been doing things. I keep thinking about how I will do all these things next semester, but I've got to do them now, or I will lose my sanity before I ever reach Christmas break!

Fight!

2008-10-21T20:55:00.000-04:00

I wasn't sure if I was ready to come back to school after fall break. I had a great, relaxing break and was not exactly looking forward to being super busy again. I was in a little bit of shock my first day back. I had such a stress-free break that it didn't feel right to be stressed out again. I have accepted the fact that this is the way life is going to be for at least the rest of the semester. I still have Election Day and Thanksgiving break to look forward to in the meantime!

I broke up an almost-fight today. The end of first block is homeroom time, when the school news show comes on. The students usually get up and move around some during this time, which I'm ok with because they've been sitting all morning. This class loves to antagonize each other. They are the lower-level class and generally come from lower socioeconomic backgrounds and bring all the issues that come with those two factors with them. Most of the time, they are joking around, but today, two boys were in each other's faces and sounded more aggressive than usual. I shouted with my louder-than-usual, slightly panicked, angry teacher voice and told everyone to sit in a desk. I grabbed the shoulders of one student, turned him around and somewhat gently pushed him to the other side of the classroom and told him to have a seat. I directed the other student to a seat on the other side of the room and took a deep breath. Unfortunately, the angrier student was making comments about fighting the other one in gym class, so I informed the assistant principal after class that it was a possibility.

Breaking up a fight was one of my biggest fears before entering the school system. I was just afraid I wouldn't know what to do and would freeze. In reality, I acted as quickly as I could. Each moment was imperative and I didn't want to see the situation escalate any further. Now that I have faced this fear (sort of), it wasn't that bad, so I think I will be ready when and if, probably when, the real thing happens.

Fall Break

2008-10-13T15:40:00.000-04:00

After a long week of homecoming festivities, hyper students, and parent conferences, fall break is here! I have been looking forward to this week off with much anticipation. Although I will spend a lot of this week catching up and trying to get ahead in lesson planning and grad school work, I also have time to relax and do some fun things, one of which is to celebrate my 2nd anniversary with Ryan.

My first parent conferences went well. I only had four and it all seemed to be students who are just not pushing themselves to their potential. They all have involved parents so now they have no choice but to push.

Each day this week was themed because it was homecoming week. Monday was hillbilly day but I didn't dress up. I didn't know if teachers would dress up, so I didn't want to be the obvious new teacher in a silly outfit. Tuesday was Decades day and freshmen had the 70s. I wore the best hippie English teacher outfit I could find. Wednesday was Wacky Wednesday so I wore mismatched, bright colored clothes. Thursday was spirit day and I sported my navy blue and gold.

Wednesday was also the day I got my first evaluation. I haven't received the results yet, so I have to wait until next week to find out how it went!

Needless to say, it was a busy week and I am so thankful for a week-long break!

Moral Crisis

2008-09-30T21:03:00.001-04:00

I've been thinking about this post for a few days and trying to decide how or if I want to tell this story. I think I'll just be vague and general.

I had a bit of a moral crisis last week as far as my teaching is concerned. I was advised to change a few things about the way I teach and this left me perplexed. My instinct and some of what I had learned in classes told me not to do what the advisers recommended. However, I was torn because it was coming from the more experienced sources. I know that I know nothing. I have no idea what I'm doing when it comes to teaching. Most days, I make it up as I go along. Doesn't this make you feel confident in the school system?

I was able to solve (somewhat) my moral crisis by seeking the advice of someone whose opinion actually matters. That would be my superior. Their advice matched what my gut was telling me to do. I breathed a huge sigh of relief and went back to my classroom with a smile, knowing I had confirmation to run my classroom the way that I am comfortable with.

That being said, there are many ways to teach and one is not better than another. As one wise person said, "Controlling a classroom is an art and the artist is always more significant than the medium. What works for one may not work for another."

Discipline

2008-09-23T21:28:00.000-04:00

I don't think I'm nearly as good of a disciplinarian as I thought I would be. I doubt my younger brother will believe that statement if he ever reads my blog. He said I would probably be "the meanest teacher ever." Both fortunately and unfortunately, his prediction was not accurate.

However, every now and then students leave me no choice but to lay down the law. Today, I had a student who I saw walk across the room with a cell phone in his hand (cell phones are illegal in public schools). I asked him to give it to me and he insisted he didn't have anything in his hand. He had managed to slip it into his pocket before walking back across the room. Near the end of class, I told him he could either give me whatever was in his pocket or I could write him up. If he had handed over the phone, it would be turned into the office and then his parents would have to come pick it up. However, he continued to insist that he didn't have anything in his hand.

When the next class started, I noticed some paper wads under the desk he had been sitting at. I found a note between him and someone else that went something like this:
Writer 1: She saw me with my friend's phone and tried to take it up. Will you take it?
Writer 2: What did she say?
Writer 1: See me after class
Writer 2: Yes, I'll take it, give it to me now.

So not only did I have a suspicion that he was lying to me, now I had proof. I hated writing him up. It makes me feel terrible to do that to a student. Maybe that's part of being a new teacher; I'm not numb to the discipline yet. However, I can't let him go without punishment. What would I be teaching him about life?

He had a tough decision to make today: turn the phone in and have his friend mad at him, or take the hit and hope to lie his way out of it. I hope he makes a better decision next time.

1st Bulletin Board

2008-09-19T21:27:00.001-04:00

I finished my first bulletin board today, this is a big moment in the life of a new teacher! We're almost finished reading The Odyssey now, but that's ok, I'll just leave it up for next semester.

2008-09-17T19:59:00.000-04:00

I was hoping I would be a frequent poster but it doesn't look like that is going to happen, at least not this semester. Being a new teacher is hard and being a full time student doesn't make it any easier.

Nevertheless, I feel it's important to share a few stories...

The first six weeks has just ended and I had 14 students fail. Actually I had 16 fail but I modified grades at the advice of my principal so the students would not lose hope. If you have an 18%, chances are not good you are going to put out a lot of effort the second six weeks. I was not sure if I fully agreed with that logic at first, but I had one-on-one conferences with the failing students today and made them sign a grade contract, promising me they are going to improve their performance, and now I see the light. I can see it because I saw it in some of the students. The one who had the 18% turned in all his work today and showed a dramatic improvement in effort. He doesn't know he has an 18, but he knows his real grade is lower than what his report card shows.

I also felt like I had failed some of the students in these conferences. I wish I had shown them what they were missing before it was too late so they could have made a passing grade. It was hard coming in right in the middle of everything though. Now I know and I will keep my students up to date. (This is a strange lesson to learn for anyone coming from college, where you're responsible for everything.)

Story#2.... We are reading The Odyssey right now, so I taught about the Greek gods on Monday. I had a student (let's call him TJ) who had a hard time accepting the fact that people worshipped something other than God with a big G. I think he felt like his faith was being challenged even though I explained to him that this was eight centuries before Christ was born. TJ is a rather dramatic child (in a funny way) and he was not satisfied until he finally asked me if I believed in Jesus. After I said yes, he said ok and went on taking notes. We always hear that learning broadens your horizons and expands your mind, but it was interesting to actually watch it happen to one student.

One more... I have a junior in my low level class. He's an intelligent student but he's been in some trouble in the past. He had to go to the office during class one day and he came back laughing. I asked him why he was laughing and he told me he had just been paddled. I laughed too. Why are we paddling sixteen year olds? He chose that over detention. Obviously it did not teach him anything. This student has been arrested multiple times and been to an alternative school, what is a paddling to him?

Everything changed

2008-09-06T18:10:00.000-04:00

On August 21st, my student teaching experience changed completely. I had signed up to be a substitute teacher so I could make a little money while getting in teaching hours. Right after first block started that morning, they called and said they needed me to sub in a freshman class. Another English teacher covered the class until I got there and gave the students a story to read and questions to answer.

I was so nervous that first day, especially first block. I was very strict and made the students stay really quiet, because I was afraid of them. I felt that if they were silent and working independently, I could control them. By fourth block, I relaxed enough that I taught a mini lesson on concrete and abstract nouns. I had to give my first "chewing out" to that class though. There was an incident where someone knocked on the door and at the same time, two students on the opposite side of the room jumped up; one student ended up on the floor with the desk flipped over. Everyone was silent as I walked over there, made sure he was not hurt, and then chewed him out, chewed her out, and then chewed the whole class out. Welcome to teaching!

I found out really quickly how exhausting teaching is. It is hard work constantly reminding students to be quiet, do their work, and keep their hands and feet to themselves! I've never said "ssshhh" so much in my life!

I learned a tough lesson after 2 days of substituting. I planned lessons for a whole week only to arrive Monday morning and discover they had already done most of what I planned. As Ms. E told me, roll with the punches!

The first full week that I subbed, I also started classes at Lee and started a part-time job. I was in SURVIVAL mode that week. I only did what I had to do to get by and nothing extra. The following week was rough too, but I was able to keep up with a few housekeeping issues in class.

I'll fill in with all the little stories later, but to make a long story less long, I found out after a few days of substituting that the teacher had resigned, so I applied for the job. I wasn't really sure if I would get it because I am inexperienced and unlicensed but I am also blessed! I got the job and am teaching freshman English for the rest of the school year. I'm a real teacher now!

Catch-up

2008-09-06T17:26:00.000-04:00

So I gave up on the teaching experience blog idea for a little while, but now I'm ready to start posts again. I have been student teaching in a senior English class in the public school system since August 1st. Here are some of the interesting moments I've had:

On the first day of school, my mentor teacher, Ms. E, had to check dress code. As soon as she announced it, more than half the class immediately tucked their shirts in simultaneously. By the time class was over, their shirts were all untucked again.
On a staff development day, the teachers took a field trip. We got on two big yellow schoolbuses and drove through some of our zoned areas. We drove through some pretty rough parts of town. It was definitely an eye opening experience to see places like that in what I thought was our safe little town.
First piece of advice from Ms. E: On her first day of student teaching, she had a whole lesson planned on a short story. She asked for a student to summarize the story and within a few minutes, a student had covered her entire lesson plan. She was speechless but her mentor teacher saved her. Her advice to me? Roll with the punches.
While instructing how to write daily journals, Ms. E said "Five sentences does not a good paragraph make." Several students asked her why she said it that way because they thought she made a mistake, although she did not. One student told her she said it Yoda-style.
During the first few days of school, students were still being transferred between classes. Although there are no assigned seats in Ms. E's class, once students have their place picked out, they don't change. When we got two new students one day, it messed up the seating arrangements. It was fun to watch a student walk in the room and have their world stopped for just a moment when someone was in their seat.
Ms. E allows the students to make coffee during journal time as long as they donate money for supplies and clean up the mess. They love it because it's such a grown-up thing to do. It's funny to see them hanging around the coffee pot making small talk, just like adults in any workplace.

First teaching experience

2008-07-16T21:18:00.001-04:00

I had my first teaching experience today. Well, not exactly. I've taught Junior Achievement and Vacation Bible School, as well as many presentations in undergrad, but this was my first experience teaching English. I taught a ten minute lesson to my peers on stage directions. I was a little nervous, but received good feedback. I will be in a real high school with real students in just a few short weeks. I feel like God is preparing me for this. Through a recent series of events, I have started to feel sympathy and compassion for high school students, something that has not been on my mind, even though I've been taking education classes for seven weeks now. I'm training to be a teacher through method and strategy, but I'm also beginning to train inwardly. I can't say the prospect of walking into a high school is any less intimidating now than it was several weeks ago, but I can say that I'm a little more prepared to face the students.

First post

2008-07-13T20:49:00.000-04:00

Welcome to my blog! I am embarking on a new journey- teaching high school English. I am a brand new teacher and equally as terrified as excited about my upcoming adventure. I made this blog so you can follow me into the unknown world of teaching American teenagers. Enjoy!